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Archive for June, 2008

And so you handed over a canvas to me,

to paint a picture of eternity in your mind

Is it like I have to touch your soul?

and some magic will trigger my hand

to ripple-off some colors on canvas,

painting some unknown creation,

– the best amalgam of You and Me!

My every step covers exactly

the footmarks left by you on sand,

may be

– a trial to know your soul,

– a venture that I love to play,

– or a heart desire into which I have plugged myself!

Whatever it is, I felt my enigma going,

up above making me to cross my horizon.

But there lay some unknown endless, an eternal time,

between step of yours

and step of mine to cover you!

Do you still believe I know you?

May be Yes, I guess!

You handed over a canvas to me,

to paint a picture of eternity in your mind

– to paint love!

I will keep all my fancies in my palm

and will toss them up into the air

without the fear of fall

with a hope that you will catch!

A stroke of some imagination

-Dance starts when soul imagines

A stroke of some desire

– Love comes when soul desires

A stroke of part of me and part of you

You and Me in the serenity-Alone!

 

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Heights!

Not able to think on any topic, so coming-up with this entry! Simple conversation between my friend P and me in Pune.

Me -: Hey, congrats for your job!

P:- Thanks. But you know, I got three more offers from I and R and A also. Here in T, even the package is less, but may be after 1 year, they will make me 15% partner of the company.

(Adding further) The company is owned by my friend and he is going for P.Hd outside. So may be after sometime I will be the director of the company.

Me:- Really????? ( pretending to be surprised)

Me:- So, whts the plan for future? When are you getting married?

P:- May be I will think about marriage after 3 years. This year I am planning for my house and next year I have to buy two cars.

Me:- two cars? Why?

P:- One I will keep in my native and the other one here.

(By-the-way what is this logic?)

Me:- How is aunty? When is she planning to visit you?

P:- She will come in Diwali. I will buy flat that time. After investing there, I am opening one BPO also. BPO requires less investment and the output is huge.

Me:- Okay then, make me the incharge of the BPO. Atleast, I can say one comapny as my own. 🙂

P:- Ooohoo, Don’t say like that, you work in I.

Me:- But I is not mine …. 🙂

Me:- Which technology are you working on?

P:- Presently it is Java and VC++. Our company is coming-up with the new product and I have suggested the name of our new product. The seniors are thinking to make me in-charge of the naming of the products.

S came in-between and I thanked her 🙂 I was in total dilemma, Was he saying the truth Or I myself was pretending it as a lie! Sorry P, but I can’t digest all these things!

 

 

 

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I love this feeling! This freeness is making me to jump from one cloud to another. Let life come in whatever color. I love colors especially when I can get them in a mix. I am happy to wait for night, to be able to see the indigo sky and love to be in night for I can wait for the day.

Yesterday was good. I got grasp of my main problem. Now I can toss my heart in air and then can run freely anywhere to catch my heart.

I came across this beautiful song luckily.

Let the moon be your guide!

 

 

One Moon shows in every pool;

in every pool, the one Moon.

–Zen Forest Saying

 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

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I looked myself in the mirror

to see a reflection of that ordinary girl.

I saw her body, her mind, her heart!

I just wanted to ask Him,

if He has created me like this,

then there must be some reason?

Please tell me that reason only once.

I promise I will forget the reason that moment only

But only once, just once, I want to know!

 

 

 

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Blessings do come from some unknown cause. Why my mind is always suspicious of ‘unknown’? Are my senses enough to transform this unknown to some known? Why can’t I let my heart to fly, to trust and to believe that blessings are coming from some unseen stars in the dark night. Why I fear change, as if change is meant for my doom only!

All these thoughts propelled me to write down these words………..

Unknown line in my palm,

Emanated from some unknown velleity,

A longing pierced my heart,

fear spurred some unfelt blow,

– a fear

from many unrealized cracks of my life,

from a leaf forgotten to be blown in autumn

from a tear hidden in every smile.

I closed my palm tightly,

to keep a secret with myself only,

Secret of a line with a doubt of unknown treasure or curse!

An anonymous moment once,

made me to open to see my delusive hope

I saw a deep dark euphoria under my skin.

A bridge from my heart to my life line,

Nexus spurred some unfelt feeling,

-a nexus

from many unseen stars in the night sky,

from a kernel left by autumn deep in softness of soil

from an angel rising from the ashes of unknown blessings!

 

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Hopefully I wrote ‘something’. I was just feeling to pen-down some words without bothering how the words would flow. And now feeling too lazy and sleepy to edit it to make it more meaningful. I doubt myself that if I leave this to be done for some other day, I won’t be able to finish it. So, posting whatever my mind has said this moment………

Sing a song for me,

For a moment of eternity,

When shyly smile of yours,

Will say everything in silence!

Sing some words for me,

Words which you have kept

In some unknown vibration,

Running in some thread,

Connecting me to you,

Connecting you to me,

Connecting us!

Sing a song for me,

For a moment called forever,

When sun drifts to give way to dawn,

Without saying anything, filling the void.

Sing some words for me,

Words uncovering the unknown magic

Magic, that makes my life as intuition.

Sing some song for me,

In the silence of your heart,

A song of your heartbeats,

Uttering every time a dream for me,

Even if my life is zigzag, invisible

But what is life, without a dream?

Sing a song for me,

For a moment of love,

Telling me to fly away to some unknown,

May be a decision for which I have to regret

But what is regret? I never tried!

Sing some words for me,

That will fly high up to give me rain of blessings.

 

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I confess that there are many desires that crave me to fulfill them. I yearn for them. At one moment when I notice any liking, my heart shoots with the imagination and I start imagining myself with the thing. A sort of trust resides in me which says that my imagination can become reality at anytime. This weired trust is upholded by my observation of getting everything that I desire from my true heart, however late it may come. I am thankful to God, that He has fulfilled whatever resonable wishes I have. TOUCHWOOD. 🙂

Recently I noticed a strange thing in my imagination. Of all these desires, I can divide them into which I want for my soul and for my mind. I felt for some of these things that even if they are not fulfilled, it will not take me in gloomy state. I surely want them but they are not as pious and important as other things that I want for my soul.
I pray to God to please fulfill all my unknown wishes, some fantasies for which my soul goes on imagining day and night.

FOR MY MIND and HEART –
– I want to live in a wooden hut covered with flowers with tulips outside.
– I want to drive a bike.
– I want to dance in rain for whole day.
– I want to eat hot fudges continously without bothering about my weight.
– I want to learn Salsa and Guitar.
– I want to learn tarot.
– I want to go on some high cliff and then want to shout with my full energy.
– I want to go somewhere outside India for few months.
– I want to taste atleast once beer, whisky, vodka or anything else. 🙂
– I want to sing a song in some concert. Totally impossible!

FOR MY SOUL –
– I want to write poem for each and every feeling of my heart
– To be on a beach for one full night under moon.
– Before dying I want to tell each and every person who crossed my life as how I felt for them,
the things I learned from them, the things that hurted me, the things that made me happy.
– I want to hold hand of my soulmate and walk continously for unknown time under mystic moon.
– May be my soul wants to leave everyone and I fear the time when my soul will do this. I suppose at that time I want to be in touch with 2-3 people. I don’t have any idea who are these people.
– I want to feel each second when I will be pregnant, want to see how it feels when another creation grows inside you.
– I want to sleep in my mom’s lap.
– I want to adopt one child.
– I want to fulfill all my unknown wishes.

Only these things I can imagine now. Hope to add in this entry my other desires when I will remember them.

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